Kills Germs*!

Him: What's next on the list?

Her: Some wipes to kill germs.

Him: Dear, I found some wipes that say “Kills Germs.” Oh, wait, there's an asterisk. Um, “Kills 99.9% of some bacteria on hard, non-porous surfaces.”

Her: Only 99.9%?

Him: Yeah, and only on hard, non-porous surfaces.

Her: Does that include my smart phone? How about the counter? What if I need to kill germs on the couch?

Him: I think the couch is out. Let's check the name brand!